My neighbors are so predictable with their anal lawn maintenance. I have no idea why I am so obsessed with them and their obsessiveness with their lawn and why it irritates, fascinates and borderline angers me. Perhaps it's my own inadequacy in the frequency of our OWN lawn maintenance which is seriously lacking any sort of motivation or desire to um...maintain.
But I digress.
I am serious when I tell you that on Halloween they taped off their lawn with yellow, almost crime scene, tape and placed notes on it that said “do not walk on grass”. Redic! I hope they got egged. My jaw dropped when I saw it. I thought a crime had been committed. I would have taken a picture and posted but I'm afraid of getting in trouble...like what if I accidentally published their address?
Sure as Sunday (or Wednesday) every Monday night they are out there raking and blowing leaves out of their treeless lawn. It really makes me want to blow all the leaves from our 5 oak tree leave littered lawn into theirs just to drive them nuts.
I also should note that our neighborhood has mainly houses built in the early 70' to late 80's and there is no HOA. It's not a fancy schmancy neighborhood by any means, not shabby or crime ridden either. It' not like Martha-fucking-Stewart lives next door.
I know I'm a total bitch for harboring such evil thoughts of these neighbors, I'm honestly not really sure what's wrong with me. Like I said, it must be a sincere feeling of inadequacy or deep rooted envy of their lawn for me to care so much.
Also, as I mentioned we have 5 oak trees in our front yard. The trees appear to have over 70% of their leaves left to fall and already our huge lawn is covered in inches of leaves. Alan and I will never, ever, ever make that mistake again. I think God was giggling at me the day we looked at the house 2 years ago and I said like a tree loving hippy, “Ohhhh, look at the BEEE-uuuu-tiful TREES! Oh my God I love them. Five! Five trees! So pretty” and I'm sure I had romantic notions of siting out there underneath the trees, picnicking.